HELLO! (March 2006) Interview by Madeleine Kingsley for HELLO! Magazine INTERVIEW TYPED EXCLUSIVELY FOR (AU NOM DE GERI) SO PLEASE ASK BEFORE USING IT.
There's already been much media buzz about the new Baby Spice-to-be. But it's only now that Geri Halliwell, mama-in-waiting, has chosen to make her six-month pregnancy official, and share with HELLO! "the most joyous news that anyone could have". Her baby is due at the end of May, which is why the former Ginger Spice, flame-haired icon of Girl Power and legendary patter of Prince Charles's bottom, can be found curled up on the sofa of her rented Los Angeles beach house, counting the stitches on her knitting. Given Geri's high-jinks, high-raunch history, this homely lobby may startle fans of the tiny pop artist who notched up four Number One hits with the Spice and another four after she went solo. So it is reassuring to report that she displays her slightly awry, purl-and-plain handiwork with a giggle and sighs that she is constantly dropping stitches. Geri's baby may be "a completely happy accident" but the birth could not be more auspiciously timed, to the very month of the 10th anniversary since Geri, Victoria, the two Mels and Emma soared to sensational fame on their platform soles and their signature song Wannabe. That's one happy event to start, and another to seal the decade that has taken Geri from a tough girlhood in Watford to LA luxury with a reputed £10 million fortune and the security of knowing she never has to work again. "It's a lovely situation to be in," she owns, "provided I'm prudent enough, and don't buy a Ferrari every day." Not that livewire Geri could ever fall idle - even now she has a bunch of creative projects, including song-writing, children's books, acting, charity plans for the women's health programme at the United Nations and - just maybe - a Spice Girl revival on the go. Her dogs may have their doubts. Dady, Geri's pet apricot Pomeranian with the bling collar and the tail that outplumes an Admiral's hat, may well have to move over and take a second place in the LA pecking order. The more famous Harry, a shi-tzu, can at least rest on his laurels. He is already a footnote in the Blair government archive, having peed on the floor at Chequers, where the uninhibited Geri took him along to dine. Geri still has the naughty air, the saucerlike blue eyes and the manslaying grin of the sparky superstar in that unforgettable Union Jack mini-dress. If she had to pick out one cherished memory from the "crazy, continuous rollercoaster ride" of the past decade, it would, she says, be performing for Nelson Mandela in South Africa. When the Spice Girls met the mighty statesman, Mandela told the press he feared he was too old for them. "No, you're not," quipped Geri. "You're as young as the girl you feel - and I'm only 25."
She says she is becoming quite an earth-mama, just for now, and is happy at home, where deer roam nearby and raccoons rattle the roof tiles. "Suddenly my decisions are not just about me", she observes, "but about what is good for another human being. I'm really interested in that ferocious protective pregnant instinct I feel. For instance, when encountering very bad driving, I want to shout, "Get out of my way! Don't you know I've a baby in here?" Fearing that past dieting extremes might have blighted her fertility, Geri says she was amazed and delighted to find herself pregnant. She is mildly amused to field questions about the supposed details of her condition as reported in the gossip columns. The baby's father was recently out shopping for a double buggy? "Really!" She has consulted the Gentle Birth method doctor favoured by Gwyneth, Elle and Kate Moss? "I haven't, but now I might look into it." The Spice Girls are planning a baby shower for her? "I've heard nothing about it. It would be lovely but you'll have to ask them." George Michael is going to be a godparent? "I haven't asked anyone yet, so I couldn't say." What Geri, who has famously sought to control her high-octane life up to now, does say is that pregnancy and childbirth confound control, and that she is happy to let "powerful nature" take its course. "Becoming pregnant, I've realised that you cannot predict what's around the corner. I could not have scripted this turn of events. I could not have planned it. According to my childhood fantasy of the big white wedding, and then the children and the 50-year marriage - this baby has not arrived in the right order. "But the wonderful thing is that when it did happen, there was not a moment's doubt about whether this child was wanted. The joy and the gratitude I felt were instant."
This is the first time you have spoken at all about your pregnancy. How was the news leaked long before you intended? "I was in a restaurant where the waiter saw my friend pat my tummy and he immediately phoned the papers. I was horrified as it was very early on and I would then have been very distressed if anything had gone very publicly wrong in the first trimester." This is the fulfilment of a long-held wish as you've been saying for ages you wanted a baby more than a Number One hit. "Musical success is great, but motherhood is probably the best vocation in the world. It's the one thing I really wanted to experience in my lifetime. I've felt broody for a child since I was 27, when something clicked with the hormones and then cranked up as I entered my 30s. "It's a particular joy to share my news as it's widely known that I had a raging eating disorder for many years. This affected my menstrual cycle, so I felt very worried that my fertility could be affected, because I'd screwed around with my body shape so much. When, finally, I did get my periods back, they were very erratic, so I feel that this baby is quite a miracle - a completely happy accident." Despite your longing, you weren't actively seeking to become pregnant. "On the contrary - it was only when I let go of the thought that my wish for a child was fulfilled. Last July I was on holiday with girlfriends in the South of France. I was discussing with them what a privilege it was to be a mother. But pregnancy, unlike my music career and business affairs, was something I could not control. I confided that I now felt I had enough heart to love a child that I did not actually give birth to. And I was genuinely considering adoption. I've a friend here in LA who did just that and looking at her adorable little boy, I was sure that I could love him as much as if he was genetically mine. But rather than rushing ahead on impulse, I decided to give myself one year really to contemplate this major step, thinking that meanwhile the prospect would take the pressure off my longing." As things turned out, you didn't have to wait that long. "No. Two months later, I found I was pregnant. It seemed to me like the immaculate conception because I'd given up on the idea."
"Absolutely my first reaction, way before fear and practically set in, was to say 'Thank you God.' My instinct was just pure gratitude. I jumped for joy and danced about a few times. Mine may not have been the perfect circumstances for a child, but whose ever are? I just felt so lucky." Yet you also mention some fear. "Nobody talks about ambivalence in pregnancy - it's just all portrayed as The Waltons. Or maybe I was told, and I didn't tune in. It's only when you are finally expecting that you realise how life-changing the experience is going to be - the biggest thing that ha ever happened. You don't know what to expect; the whole experience is completely unknown. So you just have to trust and let go." Will the baby be born in Los Angeles or London? "I haven't decided yet and I've only a month before it's too late to fly home for the birth, if I'm going to. I'm quite torn: I'm fundamentally a British girl and I want the baby to have a English accent. I'm very proud of my English heritage. But I also love the positivity and attitudes of America. "Over Christmas I was just about to buy a house in Richmond, when I discovered that planes flew so low overhead that you could read their names. So I came back to LA to finish off my drama studies of the last three years. I've established a relationship with a gynaecologist here, and his way of caretaking has been really great. He even calls to check up on me at home. And, of course, if the baby is born here, it could have dual nationality." Has it been a healthy pregnancy? "I've felt it has been a complete takeover of my body, which I'm very content about now. But it's been a huge hormonal journey, and for the first three months I felt very ill. It was like being hung over, with experienced and 24-hour sickness. "I've put on between 10 and 12 lbs (each breast now weighs about three!), gaining most weight in the first three months, all around my bottom and breasts. It's a hideous stage when you don't look pregnant, but just as if you've eaten too many pies. "Worse still, I was peering into the fridge for food one day and my back went crack. I couldn't sit down at all and basically lay on the couch for three weeks, thinking, 'Oh my God, this is only the beginning!"
This is obviously a crucial time to eat healthily. Have you been troubled by your old eating disorder demons? "No, I'm much better. My problem has been resolving naturally over the past few years. Age and experience have given me a much healthier perspective, and I've started mothering myself - really nurturing myself in other ways rather than stuffing my feelings or starving them. Now I'm like any other woman - none of us want to get a large bottom unnecessarily, but I've got it into perspective. "In early pregnancy, I wanted very plain and almost sedative foods, just bread, cheese and ham. I went off fish which was strange as I used to eat it all the time. But actually the body is clever because I've since been told not to touch fish, because of the mercury in it. I then began wanting oranges all the time and found that my nutritionist was right - if I started eating better I would naturally start wanting those better foods. "In the last few days, though, I've learned that my insulin levels are way too high, almost certainly because I've been eating too much of the fruit I thought was so good for me and the baby. Now I have to eat little and often, choosing more high protein, and the vegetables I've avoided since childhood. "I still don't want them, so they've given me loads of vitamins and minerals and a disgusting green drink that looks like seaweed. Knowing there's a baby in me, okay. I'll drink it! Folic acid? I'll take it - I'll even swallow that awful iron with its unmentionable consequences!" How changed do you feel by impending motherhood? "In the first trimester I felt horrible and unsexy, and even when I recovered, I was giving out a slightly different energy - more earth-mamaish. Normally you have your mojo switched on; you feel confident and your pheromones rise when out on the town. As a pregnant woman you are suddenly almost out of bounds, because you have a big bump sticking out and it signifies 'Job's already done!'
"Being pregnant, too, I really admire women so much more. We are so strong and versatile and really do rule the world through the gift of childbearing." So do you see single motherhood as an extension of Girl Power? "Girl power, for me, was a powerful, positive message that anything was possible. It was all about breaking out of the box and through frontiers. It's what we achieved in two years as the Spice Girls, having been told, categorically, that a girl band would never make it. "I see being a mother as Woman Power. Single motherhood obviously takes a certain amount of strength and commitment, whether you find yourself in that position through choice or not. I am going it alone by choice, but I'm trying to make it a responsible choice. I certainly recognise that every child is entitled to the gift of a father." Does that mean your baby's father will be involved? "Ultimately, though we are still in working out to what extent. I would never deprive a child of the right to know its father." You are not saying, then, that you would choose to be a single mother on principle? "Ideally, if I thought I was with the right man, it would be nicer to be in a couple. But I've seen many people stay together for the wrong reasons, and I wouldn't do that just for the sake of bringing up a child - particularly in my situation." Meaning that you are financially independent and you don't have to? "I think a child can still receive the love of two great parents who are not necessarily together. We don't have to live together to be supportive." So what do you hope the baby's father will contribute? "That's another detail which, like the crib and nappies. I haven't yet thought through. I've only just grasped the fact that I'm actually going to have a child at the end of all this! Honestly, I had no real concept of the end result until the baby started to kick. I think a pregnancy lasts nine months not just to grow a baby but to allow you time to come to terms with the idea that at the end there is going to be another living soul here for you to nurture. In the early stages you feel pregnant, but your first scans show something that looks more like a potato than a little person. I thought that I was carrying Potato Halliwell."
How did you meet in the first place? "Again, I don't really want to get into all that, but I will say that I am good friends with the father, whom I've known for years. So yes, I still see him. It takes two to have a baby and without him I wouldn't be in this positive situation now." He, however, was said to be much shocked when he heard the baby news. Is that true? "I wouldn't like to speak on his behalf; that wouldn't be fair or kind. But the baby seems a happy accident." What drew you to him in the first place? "I'm a single woman and we dated for a while. He's a very sweet, smart person and, obviously, we were intimate as, despite my joke, this baby is the result of being intimate and not the Immaculate Conception. It was clearly not planned. "It's one thing to be suddenly becoming a parent, but also to be dragged into the media spotlight - that would be unfair on anyone, so I want to preserve his space and his anonymity. I've been the subject of kiss and tell by ex-boyfriends myself. I know how that feels and it's tacky. I would never be a juicy kiss-and-teller and I don't want this man to feel betrayed." He must have known that you were broody: you have said so many times. "You know what? We were just having a nice time together. Pregnancy was just so not on my agenda. That's the irony of it. I've been in other relationships where I've thought, 'Yeah! This is the one.' in a very immature, short-lived way. Ours was a mature, sweet relationship where we having a very nice time getting to know each other. But had there been no baby involved, our liaison would just have run its natural course. Pregnancy changes the nature of a relationship. "To sum up: I've chosen not to be with the father as we are better off as friends. We just dated for a bit; but then I found I'd been left with a beautiful gift, with which I'm so, so delighted." This is the man who may want to be around for school sports days, plays, graduation… Are you happy about that? "Yeah, of course. I think it's great."
What characteristics do you hope you will both pass on to the baby? "He's very smart; we are both very creative and… Oh my God… I hope it looks like me! I want my baby to have blue eyes." Do you still hope to find someone you can share your life with? "Yes, but the baby takes the pressure off that longing. I don't now feel any desperation to find a man. I love sex and being intimate and sharing. I would love a soul mate. Sharing exploration and adventure with the right someone else is so much nicer. But if, in the flow of life, I am not meant to meet that someone until 92, so be it." Ideally, as the daughter of a Catholic mother, would you have preferred to do things in the old-fashioned order-marriage before motherhood? "I like the fantasy I've had since I was a little girl - of having the big white wedding and then the children in a marriage that lasts for life. I'm a complete traditionalist. I like a long courtship, and I take my time before I get emotionally or physically involved with somebody. "So when life doesn't happen as I've planned it, everything goes up in the air, which on the one hand is very liberating and on the other is quite shocking. "It would be nice to find yourself pregnant in the perfect situation, but I'm not sure that exists anymore." What would have to happen for you to have a relationship that lasts considerably longer than the sort you had with Chris Evans and Jerry O'Connell - which, as you observed, came to life at Christmas and were over by Valentine's Day? "I'd have to find the best. Whilst recognising that no-one is perfect I am not brilliant at compromising. I want someone who is my equal, someone who can be very stimulating and supportive." In your autobiography Just for the Record, you take a page and a half to list the qualities you require in a man. They include honesty and virility, trustworthiness and the means to afford first class travel! What faults would you tolerate? "If I really fancied someone, all those requirements would go right out of my head. I recognise now that the list is never going to be reality. In the end my choice will be totally instinctive, down to pheromones. Hormones rule the world and I will marry when I meet someone I can't not!"
We know you've been seeing quite a bit of the Beckhams lately. What baby advice has Victoria given you? "All the Spice girls have been really lovely and supportive, absolutely sweet and wonderful. There is a great feeling between us. Victoria in particular, has shared her experiences with me and been very loving and nurturing. She's given me the cosy and yummy ponchos she wore during her last pregnancy and emotionally she has put her arms around me. I cannot tell you the importance of that sisterhood in pregnancy. No man can give you that kind of support." In this tenth anniversary year of the Spice Girls debut, are you five going to get back together? "I can't really say until we are all together in a room. I feel it would be inappropriate to speak for the others. The Spice Girls is five. There have been whispers and mumbles - but only when we have got together in one room and agreed 'Yes!' will you hear it loud and clear! Watch this space. "I personally would love it. I'm so proud of being part of that creation. For me every note, every vision of it was very much from the heart, a very personal journey for me. I was very attached to it. I'm very resolved now as an individual and I'd feel very comfortable about honouring what we did." Even though Ginger has long gone? Would you go orange again? "Ginger is one of my alter egos and reviving her would be just like Bruce Wayne becoming Batman again. I'm not sure I would want to dye my hair orange! I would love to revive the camaraderie and those feelings of fun and spirit and empowerment we ignite in one another." How have you kept fit these last few months? "Everybody knows me as a gym-aholic, but I haven't gone much at all in the past year or so. I've just bought a really great mama-yoga tape and kept it really simple. The wonderful thing about yoga is that as the baby's growing there seems no room for your organs. Yoga stretches everything out and males space, which feels lovely."
"Part of me is homebody, who likes stability, but equally, I'm quite a nomad and I can imagine travelling with the baby strapped to my back. That's a good reason for keeping things simple as far as equipment is concerned. If I can breastfeed, I will. "Hmm, maybe I'm more of an earth mother than I realised! Childbirth and baby rearing went on for centuries, after all, before all these consumer baby refinements arrived in the shops, I feel quite organic about the whole thing. Perhaps I'll just wrap the infant in a tea towel and be content. Even though I realise that I'm going to have to make some changes and give up a lot, I do believe the baby will slot into my life. "I actually feel very natural about looking after a baby, because I've looked after my nieces and nephews and changed nappies since I was a little girl. I don't claim to be an expert, but it doesn't feel completely alien." So you are going for a natural birth? "I'm not going to be a martyr in labour. If I'm in that much pain, I'll have an epidural. If the doctor says my hips are too narrow, I'll take the Caesarean. I will do whatever is healthiest for this baby. I haven't decided on a birth partner yet - maybe a close friend, maybe my Mum. Maybe I will have a gang! "Nature is so bloody powerful that whatever I plan for the birth, real life could suddenly go off on a different tack. When I was a child and led a fantasy life to make myself feel better, I'd say I was born on a plane. Can you imagine how hideous if that invention came back to haunt me in May! "I've realised that there is no perfect way to deliver a baby. It would be great if I could just have a bit of gas and air, and at the end of a purely pain-free enlightening experience I just got up afterwards, put my jeans on and we all went home! But it's going to happen the way it happens." Are you going to have a nanny? "I think I will. My friends say that if you can afford it, do it. Given that I am a single mother it will allow me to enjoy the baby more, because I won't be as tired." Are you hoping for a boy or a girl - and have you chose names? "I could find out now which I'm having, but I'm just excited to be having a baby. Initially I wanted a boy. In my fantasy, it was always a boy first, then girl. But now I really don't mind, and lean, if anything more towards a girl. A relationship with a daughter could be bonding, and there's also the superficial thing in me that goes 'Ooh. I could really dress her up.' You can have a lot of fun with ribbons and pretty-in-pink froufrou. "For a boy, I fancy an artistic name like Leonardo. For a girl, I like Stella, because it's a really good, strong, sassy name, and my own middle name is Estelle." What will you sing to the baby? "Apparently a baby is sensitive to sound from the fifth month, so I'm already singing Carpenter's ballads like Masquerade to it and a song with the lyrics, "The loneliness goes… when two people can dream a dream together." How is your little dog Dady going to take to the new arrival? "This dog has been such a surrogate baby to me. Dady likes love more than food. He seeks constant attention, saying 'Massage me, snuggle me.' I think he might be a bit jealous, and think 'Grrrr', but I hope he is going to be loving."
"I'm sure mothering is no easy task and I'm sure I will tear my hair out at certain points. I'm just hoping this child is more angel than devil's child! To think that it might one day be going to the equivalent of the raves I went to, or driving away my car without permission the way I took my Dad's is horrifying. I think, 'Please don't!' "I'm sure having my own child will make me appreciate my own mother more. She was warm, funny, playful… and I am so grateful that she worked so hard for us, going out cleaning and looking out for us the best way she could." Do you think she was right not to want you to go on the stage? "It was probably best for me because I had a real childhood and then I had to fight for my career. Having said that, I don't know how I would feel if my child wanted to do the same. If he or she wanted to and it came naturally, then I wouldn't stop it. But I'd never push. I shan't be introducing the concept of fame - certainly not the seedier, paparazzi side of it. I shall try and keep its environment as sane and normal as possible." What are you going to tell your child about the Spice Girls era? "That I haven't thought about! When I auctioned off my Spice Girls outfit for Sargent Cancer Care I thought, 'What is the point of keeping all this stuff just to show for five minutes and hear any kids of mine shrug, 'Yeah… Whatever!' Let's face it, children will never think their parents are cool, or certainly not until they are a lot older. They are more likely to be embarrassed." Your child is obviously going to have a lot more material benefits than you had in Watford. No second-hand blazer for the young Halliwell. "Yes, but I don't want any child of mine to have everything on a plate because I think it takes away drive. We all need purpose and direction and a child has to learn the value of money." How would you like your child to turn out? "Let it find its own way whether it wants to be an artist or a dentist… but I do rather hope it doesn't want to be a dentist." What are you most looking forward to? "To meeting this little thing and seeing what it looks like. It's going to be the most changing moment. I know from the scans that this child has my turned-up nose already. Wow, imagine if he or she is a bit like me, and I see myself in another human being. That would be mind-blowing. I'm also really looking forward to not thinking about me. I really love the idea of being selfless." One of your big Spice hits was the song to celebrate Mothers' Day - Mama. That seems to have a special relevance for you now. "I've been thinking about that! It must be such a special feeling when a child says, 'Mama, I love you.' It must be beautiful." Interview by Madeleine Kingsley for HELLO! Magazine INTERVIEW TYPED EXCLUSIVELY FOR (AU NOM DE GERI) SO PLEASE ASK BEFORE USING IT.  |
At
her base in Los Angeles, Geri Halliwell breaks her silence about her headline-making
pregnancy - "There was not a moment's doubt about whether this child was wanted.
The joy and gratitude I felt were instant. 
Now
33, she has lost the look of the "skinny yoga freak" she later developed and,
lunching on healthful chicken salad, explains that she is happy to have outgrown
the alarming binge-starve eating disorder of her 20s. Her hair is strawberry blonde
tumble and her dress style, bump-accommodating sweat pants and a tiny black t-shirt.
So,
are you really having twins Geri? "I have absolutely
no idea where that story came from. One baby is quite enough for the moment, thank
you very much! One at a time! But I definitely won't stop at one." 
How
did you discover that you were pregnant? "This is so
intimate that maybe you should mark it for women only! I was having long cycles
anyway - 30-40 days - and, when pre-menstrual would always go up a dress size
and have swollen my breasts. Thinking it a bit strange when I got to day 50, I
bought myself one of those pregnancy tests that allows you three goes. The first
time I misread the instruction, and the result came up negative. Two days later,
I tried again, and the response came up 'yes.' 
You
certainly seem to have picked up and bloomed. "At three
months I shifted gear and felt my energy rise. I was so excited to have it back.
I was back in England and had to shop for new clothes because I couldn't fit into
anything. I wanted relaxed clothes that didn't leave me looking a frump - a lot
of Juicy Couture-style sweat pants and cute little Empire-line dresses. You can't
dress provocatively as a mother-to-be and I've learned to work the bits of my
body that allow for it: I dress up in big earrings, and I've made sure my skin
is in good shape. I've stared to buy nice shoes and handbags." 
"All
this has made me realise how hormones rule the world. I'm no longer looking outwards
to men for validation or completion. I just feel content with having a baby inside
me. It's that biological thing of what nature has served me - just for now. 
The
baby's father has already been identified in celebrity gossip columns. Apparently
he's said that he intends to give you and the baby all the support you need. So
why don't you want to discuss him here? "He's not a
famous person. I want to guard his privacy. I've been a public figure now for
ten years and it's my territory. But this man hasn't asked to be in the public
eye, so I don't want to drag him into it." 
Will
you mind your child going off visit at weekends? "That
too, I haven't really thought about. I'm sure we'll do whatever seems the most
comfortable and appropriate to both of us. But give us a chance - the baby's not
even appeared yet." 
Could
the brevity of your relationships with men have any link with a father who left
home when you were nine and with whom you had few perfects moments and quite lot
of disillusions? "I've done all that therapy-schmerapy
and yes, it has helped me, up to a point, understand myself. But you know what?
Now I think, 'Enough theorising. Stop analysing. Get on with life and make whatever
mistakes it takes'. I'm starting to trust myself and my instinct so much more."
Tell
us about the lifestyle you foresee for you and the baby. "I've
already had my Georgian dream house - my 'Gone with the Wind' house in Surrey,
and part of me regrets ever selling it. It was too big when I was on my own, but
it would be nice to have it now. I then bought a London house just for the sake
of it, so this time when I buy I have to love it. 
Have
you considered what kind of mother you want to be? "I
really hope that this child and I can have fun together? I am a disciplinarian:
I think kids like boundaries and feel safer if they know what limits are. Then
it's like playing in a very secure, comfortable garden. I don't want to be either
controlling or suffocating in a way that could make a child want to catapult away
and out into the universe at a million miles an hour. So I would give him or her
freedom to make mistakes whilst also giving guidance and discipline.